Foolish Games

It's a boy!

Don't ask me what the title of this post is about... it just popped into my head. Nor would it do to ask me what this post is about, for I do not know that either.

2007 huh? I guess I'm in a bit of daze... so much has been happening of late that it all seems a bit surreal . Not that it's been all eventful for me, but generally a lot seems to be happening with everyone.

I have some big news to relate personally, but I shall wait a bit before revealing it here. It wouldn't do to have to come back and recant if things don't quite pan out as expected. No real secret though, and so I have already told a number of you... well, depends who's actually left reading this thing.

In any case, I'm in a strange mood.

hmm... now I recall something that occurred to me earlier.

I wish to apologise to anyone that I may have offended and/or hurt during the course of the previous year (and beyond I guess). I can be careless at times with my words and actions... and at other times I'm just plain stupid.

2007. I spent NYE with some friends in south Canberra, arriving after a heavy hailstorm that left the streets dressed in white. After the countdown we wrote down some NY's resolutions and shared them. I haven't made any NY's resolutions for quite some time, but I settled on something... useful.

"To be more joyful in all that I do."

Why? Well, simply put, because I'm not joyful enough. There is every reason to be joyous, as I have salvation through Jesus Christ. Next to this, what difficulties and challenges in this life can compare?

But of course I struggle. At times I can be cynical, depressive, pessimistic and/or discouraging. How great it would be to simply be joyful, because I am so blessed?

There were too many years not knowing God's love, and perhaps slowly the barriers in my heart will be washed away. The walls I put up to protect myself, that chip on my shoulder, that anger I feel towards myself, those insecurities I've stored up over time, the bitterness tainting parts of my life...

I need to be more vulnerable... so I am better able to trust in our Heavenly Father. For what little strength I do have is given from Him. I wonder if I present myself to others as strong?

I wonder what happened to quiet Son... more contemplative Son... have I really embraced the clown that's replaced him?

haha, well, to you then, caveat emptor - buyer beware.

posted by Son @ 00:02